"A thing must be loved before is loveable"

Tuesday morning I talked with my Elders about my future plans. I have to say I am incredibly blessed to be in the midst of such wise men. One of the things they made clear to me, was that they would give me counsul, but as for my decisions, they are my own, because before Christ I alone am accountable for how I use my life. That is some profound stuff.

And so I'm not going to Africa, or Mexico, or on any mission. For now.

I'm doing this because to work in the field takes grit, and takes wisdom, and a person needs skills to contribute to the ministry. I have grit... maybe.

So for now, I'm going to finish my summer job, and then work for my CNA. Eventually I'm going to go for my RN degree.

Caring for people has always been what I've felt most right doing. I've seen alot of hospitals and the blessing of a warm and caring heart is incredibly powerful. I want to work mercy in people's lives.

While I go for my RN, I'm going to try and get as much Biblical knowledge as I can. I want to be able to lead people to Christ, to disciple them, to be a sharp tool.

It's funny. I've had so much angst about school and the Idea of college. But I see now that it was because I lacked purpose that I had those feelings. Needless to say I have a new passion.

It's been hard these last couple days with starting work, and other stresses to keep my head up. This being an adult thing hit me alot harder than I thought it would. Really I'm just incredibly lonely.

I'll talk more about my Job next time, I'm tuckered out.

Much Love all, and a pillow.